Having gone through a divorce, I know that the process can be emotionally draining and challenging. The previous system required one of you to accuse the other of something to legally separate, which made an already demanding time even harder.

However, on April 6 2022, in the UK, No-Fault Divorce was introduced. The first in 50 years, this pivotal change could allow couples to split up without resorting to the blame game. Suppose a couple can mutually agree on their separation, now, they can do so without having to point fingers and play the “blame game.

You may feel exhausted and hopeless while going through a divorce. You might feel guilty, frustrated, or despair, when you feel like no progress is being made. This is normal – this is to be expected – because it’s more than “normal” as there are healthy ways you can cope with your emotions during this challenging period.

To get through this process, however,  remember these three tips:

1. Don’t permit yourself to feel bad all the time.

Okay, this might seem like a contradiction. The point is that you need to feel your feelings and experience the emotions you are feeling. One of my mentors, Elise Spittle, said there is healing in the feeling. Remember,  you’re more than your current situation, feelings, and experience. That which is within you; your essence is programmed to experience love, joy and compassion. When you are not focussed on your situation, your true nature allows you to experience these feelings, however fleeting.

2. You should try to be kind to your ex—

Controversial, I know, but it is true. You are both going through a difficult situation. You have your own hurts and versions of your relationship, which have brought you to this point of divorce. 

As stated above, when I was not focused on the divorce and blaming my ex- for the current situation, there were moments when I could appreciate his position too.

This is not the case in every instance; however, be open to the fact that there may be moments you could feel compassion for your ex-. Right now, they probably don’t deserve any additional pain or grief on top of what they’re already going through because of the divorce itself. After all, compassion is one of the virtues of your true nature.

3. You will get through this!

Your life may feel like a series of one never-ending, painful stage after another—you’re probably in the middle of it now. Maybe you don’t even remember what it’s like to live without this.

But as much as it doesn’t feel like it, you WILL get through this. I know it hurts right this moment, and that’s okay. There are brighter days ahead —it might not be super bright yet, but it is there. And once you get there, you’ll be able to figure out how to put your life back together again. You’ve made it through much bigger things than this before—and you’ll make it through this too!

You’re not alone in this—I’m here for you every step of the way.

If you want to have a 1:1 confidential conversation, click here to book a complimentary session.

MY NAME IS…

Janet Rhynie

My purpose is to elevate and liberate your mind from limitation to live the life you have yet to imagine and change the life of those for generations to come.

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